So in the past 6 months I’ve learned a new game. Instead of playing Texas Hold em, which is what you see on TV, I am now playing Omaha for a living. I started out really hot and fell in love with the game. I saw the potential for making real money, and for once in my life started to believe that maybe I could get out of this prison of mediocrity.
I’ve been poor my whole life. My family was poor, we were never broke but lower middle class. I went to school with mostly asian kids who had nuclear families and both parents working professionals who owned a house, I never had the same vacations they had. Then I followed the naive advice that was given to my generation, to go school get a degree, except I didn’t scholarships, nor parents paying for my education. I racked up student loan debt in a directionless career. I never graduated, because I didn’t love any subject and didn’t have the money to continue. I dealt drugs for a bit and fell into poker through friends of friends at 25.
I started making a living wage early on, maybe $15/hour for the first 6 months tax free, eventually going up to about $20/hour. I got screwed by a “friend” for a huge debt, but saved enough for to travel for a couple of months. Falling into omaha 6 months ago, I saw potential for real money where I could maybe make 6 figures in a year.
This got me excited, because for once in my life I thought maybe I could escape this hell of mediocrity. Yet, in the last 3 months I have hit a downswing. I am not playing well and my confidence is low, so I am writing this to remind myself to be grateful for what I have.
I don’t have a job
I am not making money for anyone else. I don’t get taxed. I can choose my own hours, and I can sleep in when I want.
I’m paid based on performance
I get what I put in (eventually). Maybe I don’t win today, but the more I work, the more I will get out.
I love the game
I really do. I enjoy sitting there, competing against other players, trying to take their money. I couldn’t imagine working customer service or doing some inane thing over the computer. It’s fun to gamble, it’s fun to compete.
It’s never boring
The game is sick, the people are degenerate. It’s never boring. It’s not the same coworkers sharing their same stories every day. I meet new people every day and also sick degenerates who have interesting stories. I get to play against multi millionaires on a tuesday morning. Who else gets to do that?
I can travel when I want
If I wanted to go live in London tomorrow for 2 months and play poker, I could. I don’t need time off, I don’t need permission. There’s a lot of freedom.
Poker is a vehicle I am using to make money for now. I love the game and it gives me all kinds of freedom. I am grateful for my life and this game. It’s given me a lot and taught me so much about myself. I have the potential to make real money this year and I don’t know where I would be without it.
It’s been a tough downswing and my confidence is shaken. I had to write this post in an attempt to stay positive.
Fuck though, life’s not so bad. I took daygame bootcamp with Yad, no success yet but I’m getting laid off some mediocre girls at least. I am going to the gym and getting some size. I’m a young good looking dude in a 1st world country who has no boss and the freedom to do what I want. Life’s not so bad after. Keep your chin up.
The universe provides