Man’s Prison

“Men are not prisoners of fate, but of their own mind” – Franklin Roosevelt

I just came back from the bank where I deposited some cash from the tables. I often have to go talk to tellers because I’m less likely to get flagged when moving money. The bank and the government think I am unemployed and living at home so it gets shady sometimes.

The teller today was an old acquaintance I met through an ex girlfriend years ago. I saw him last March before I headed to South East Asia for the first time and he is working the same job, now recently single, and living at home. This cat is 25 years old and would have an “above average” stable job working at the bank with “decent money”.

He’s a good man, and we got along. Even now, with no spark of life in his eyes, he was genuinely happy for me and my travels. He even admitted “I don’t have the balls to do it, I like the stability”. I wanted to weep. He hasn’t even been considered for a promotion.


The automation is coming. Bank’s don’t need tellers anymore, even though he speaks 3 languages and has a degree. This isn’t a guy getting phased out at fucking Mcdonald’s. He speaks 3 languages and has a undergrad in business.

And he’s getting phased out.

You’re a young man born in the first world! We literally have the entire world at our feet. Even if you go broke at 25, even 30. Who gives a shit? You have friends, family, there’s a couch out there SOMEWHERE if you went busto. Then you can come back to the same hell you live in now, a 9-5 job with no time, no money, no potential and no freedom.

I was in a funk coming back from London + Spain. I was focusing on all the wrong things. I broke up with a girl, I couldn’t hang out with Riv much in Madrid, I didn’t get laid in Spain.

This interaction brought me back to the reality. The reality of most men in this world. Shit job, shit money, no girl, no freedom. The “lucky ones?”. Decent job, decent money, one meh girl, and NO FREEDOM.

What do I have in comparison to that?

Seemingly everything.

I work for myself and no other. I play poker for a living. I have a great roommate and a few great friends. I have friends all over the world from this desolate blog in a corner of a corner of the internet. I traveled to 3 continents and 4 countries this year. I have my health. I’ve fucked more girls than 10 men combined. I answer to no one.

And I barely worked for this!

I’m not saying I was lazy, I had some things that helped me along the way. I had a poker coach, but I worked for hours on my game. I approached the girls, I hit the gym, I took the risks. Honestly, my effort wasn’t that great, it’s just the average guy must not do anything!

When I compare myself to the real hustlers, I’m so far behind. Guys like Krauser and Tom travel the world and fuck girls. Guys like Kyle + James left their 6 figures office jobs to have the freedom to do what they want, with their own business.

My man Riv, 6 years from a divorce, 2000 approaches later decided to move to a foreign country. In his 40’s he now two banging girlfriends, 21 and 24 years old!

When I look at them, I want to be like them. I want to do the work and create the same lifestyle they do. My heart swells with optimism about the future.

When I look back at my old life, the same dead eyes I once had, I now stare into.

It’s as if I am an escaped convict, bringing news of the outside world and it’s possibilities to the inmates I left behind. They look at me and yearn for the life I have.

When we were all locked up together, in that old prison the guards threw us in and slammed the cell shut. But the guards have all left, the prison long abandoned.

Except for the prisoners, chained by their disbelief in their cells.

They just never tried the door.


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